Pillars of Salt and Sand
by Spike'sSavior
Summary: Joker is taken to the Arkham infirmary and gets a surprise he wasn't counting on. JokerXHarley.


This is just a one shot that came and smacked me in the face right before I was gonna go to sleep and I had to stay up and write the thing. So yea sorry if it sucks. Tell me what you think please I'ma total review whore.

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"Joker!"

He looked over at the guards and his new therapist standing at the door to his fish bowl cell and scowled.

"What, I'm busy," he scowled as he looked back to the house of cards he was building.

"You need to come with us," the doctor said and he sighed irritated as he stood up, making sure not to jar the table and cause the house of cards to tumble down.

He went over to the door and turned around, sticking his hands through the small slot in the door. He felt the cold metal of the handcuffs clasp around his porcelain wrists. He slid his now cuffed hands back into the cell and turned around as one of the guards opened the door.

Joker stepped out into the hall and he took a quick look around, there were 10 guards and he smiled two more than the last time he had been out, but then again he had almost killed an inmate with a shiv in the cafeteria last week because the man had looked at him wrong.

Two of the guards grabbed him roughly and began to lead him down the hall. He glanced to his right and left every now and again. He saw all the familiar faces; Harvey, Red, Crane. He frowned slightly when he saw that Harley wasn't in her cell. If she had escaped without him there would be hell to pay the next time he saw her.

"Where's Harley?" he demanded but one of the guards told him to shut his mouth and that was all he was given.

His curiosity grew as he was led into the infirmary, past beds with deranged idiots strapped down to beds because they were having a hissy fit. They led him over to a secluded corner of the infirmary covered by a thin sheet.

The doctor pulled the curtain back and he saw Harley lying on a hospital bed. She was covered in sweat and looked utterly exhausted and out of it.

"H-Hey Mistah J." she said weakly.

He raised an eyebrow and turned to the doctor and guards "Ok," he said wondering why they thought he should care that his henchwench was in the infirmary. It wasn't his concern, he hadn't done this to her.

"Ms. Quinzel thought you might want to meet your son," the doctor said with distaste as he looked in the small hospital crib by her bed.

"Son?" Joker said taken completely aback. He had known Harley was pregnant but he just thought that it would go away if he ignored it. The doctor picked the baby wrapped in a blanket out of the crib and it began to cry.

"Can he hold 'im?" Harley asked as she looked over at Joker with love sick eyes.

The doctor looked down at the babe and then back at the unusually quiet Joker before nodding hesitantly. The guards grabbed him roughly again and felt them un-cuff him and move his arms in front of him before cuffing him once more.

The doctor placed the baby in Joker's arms. He looked down at the thing in his arms. It was ugly, could hardly open its eyes, had no hair, and no teeth. Joker had never wanted to kill something so much in his whole entire existence. He wanted to kill this thing more than he wanted to kill Batman.

But he couldn't do it. He wanted to drop the babe and step on its bald head until it busted open like a watermelon, he wanted to snap its fragile neck in his hands. But he couldn't do it.

"My, my, I never thought I'd see the day when the Joker was scared," the doctor said smugly and Joker looked up at him and growled menacingly.

"His name's Gabriel," Harley said. Gabriel, he chuckled at the irony. How two devils could create something and then name it after God's archangel. Joker looked down at the small thing in his arms as he heard it make a noise. The thing's eyes had opened slightly and his son stared back up at him with green eyes.

He had always wanted a son, if only to continue his work after he was killed. But something had changed as Gabriel stared up at him with trusting eyes. Did he really want his son to become a monster? He wanted to kill it, but he couldn't. He ordered his muscles to work and to squeeze the life out of the thing…no not the thing, Gabriel.

Gabriel made another noise that sounded close to a laugh and Joker couldn't help but smile. Harley squealed with delight from her bed as she saw her puddin' and son together. Maybe now they could finally settle down and become a real family.

"Alright, that's enough," the doctor said as he took the baby from Joker and placed it back in the crib. Gabriel began to cry and Joker took an unconscious step forward before being pulled back and taken roughly as he forced to put his hands behind his back once more and he was taken out of the infirmary. The sound of his son's crying following him all the way back to his cell.

Joker rubbed his wrists as he let loose in his cell once more and he was left alone with his cards and thoughts. He walked back over to the table and sat down slowly and looked at the almost complete house of cards.

"Joker!"

He looked over and saw Harvey from across the hall standing, flipping his coin, a grin on his face.

"So a Joker jr. huh, I'm sure Harley thinks this means you'll settle down now," Harvey said with a vicious smirk.

"Fuck off," he growled.

"So who does the brat take after, you or your bimbo?" Harvey asked.

Joker stood from the table and glared at the former lawyer. Harvey laughed before turning and walking over to his bed to lay down. Joker heard a small fluttering noise behind him and he looked over his shoulder to see that his house of cards had fallen into an unceremonious heap.

"Fuck."


End file.
